Today I have 100 sober days. Triple digits…I am overjoyed!
When I joined Team 100 and made the pledge not to drink for 100 days. I wasn’t sure that I could do it. But there was something about committing for only a certain number of days that comforted me. I wanted to stop drinking and I loved the “anything but forever” feel it had to it. I could do that. It’s not for life. It’s a long time but no one was making me promise to never, ever drink again.
That’s the most overwhelming step to face when you know you have a drinking problem. The terrifying thought that if you tell someone how awful are, what a mess you’ve gotten into, then they will make you promise to change your ways forever and you will be forced into a lifelong booze ban that you don’t feel ready for. Well, that’s not the case here. I felt absolutely no pressure to do anything other than attempt the challenge and keep trying until I got there. Lucky for me, I got there on my first try. This was by no means my first try at getting sober. I’ve had many failed attempts!!
I promised myself that I wouldn’t think about what would happen after the 100 days, it really takes the pressure off. I have learned so much, gathered many sober tools. New coping strategies have been adopted and I have done a lot of work on understanding my behaviour when it comes to emotions and escapism.
What I have learned is that I have much still to learn. I am a work in progress and while I sometimes find the recovery side of things a bit boring, flat and not my kind of party, I am reaping the benefits enough to want to continue growing and learning.
I am so grateful to Belle and all of the Team 100 members. Today I have had so many wonderful messages of support and encouragement and a beautiful card from my husband saying how proud he is of me! I have had the BEST day. I am suffering bout of the Imposter Syndrome, as I am so overwhelmed by Belle’s post and Lily’s post. I am sure they must be talking about someone else!!
I have no plans to drink, I am going to do another 100 days and stick around to watch all of my team mates reach and pass their goals so that I can give back the support and praise that I have received.
Team 100 is awesome, being sober rocks!!